If you are Lisa’s Facebook friend, you may have seen this article on her Facebook feed this week. The policy that the author writes about-- where kids do not have to share or give up a toy they are using, even if another child wants it-- and the reasoning behind it is what we believe about sharing here at Ashland Children’s Garden—with a few additions of our own.
We, like the author of the article, want children to learn the important lesson that wanting a toy does not make them entitled to that toy if another child is using it. However, we also want them to feel the joy that comes from sharing. When one child is particularly sad waiting for a turn with a toy, we may ask the child who has the toy to look at the sad child’s face, asking them to notice he or she looks sad. Then we let them know they could make their friend happy if they shared. We don’t pressure the child to give up their toy or make them feel guilty, we just make them aware that a friend is sad. When a child is willing to share we make a REALLY big deal about it, by asking them to notice how happy they made their friend and by telling them what a great friend they are. We believe this helps to raise children who have generous spirits, who as adults will be happy to donate to a favorite charity, volunteer in their communities, or give their time to friends and family.
In a perfect preschool world, every child would be able to spend as much time as they wanted at an activity, and their turn would only be over when they were ready to move on. However, the reality of a structured preschool setting (and beyond) is that children have to take turns and sometimes they have to move on from an activity before they are done. We have planned turn taking activities into our learning through play to help children with this. For example, we only have two easels but we may have six children who want to paint, so sometimes we have to tell a child that their turn is over so that everyone gets a turn. This not only teaches children about fairness in sharing, it also prepares them for the reality of turn-taking in their everyday lives.
You can find the article at http://moms.popsugar.com/Should-You-Teach-Kids-Share-27333250.
We, like the author of the article, want children to learn the important lesson that wanting a toy does not make them entitled to that toy if another child is using it. However, we also want them to feel the joy that comes from sharing. When one child is particularly sad waiting for a turn with a toy, we may ask the child who has the toy to look at the sad child’s face, asking them to notice he or she looks sad. Then we let them know they could make their friend happy if they shared. We don’t pressure the child to give up their toy or make them feel guilty, we just make them aware that a friend is sad. When a child is willing to share we make a REALLY big deal about it, by asking them to notice how happy they made their friend and by telling them what a great friend they are. We believe this helps to raise children who have generous spirits, who as adults will be happy to donate to a favorite charity, volunteer in their communities, or give their time to friends and family.
In a perfect preschool world, every child would be able to spend as much time as they wanted at an activity, and their turn would only be over when they were ready to move on. However, the reality of a structured preschool setting (and beyond) is that children have to take turns and sometimes they have to move on from an activity before they are done. We have planned turn taking activities into our learning through play to help children with this. For example, we only have two easels but we may have six children who want to paint, so sometimes we have to tell a child that their turn is over so that everyone gets a turn. This not only teaches children about fairness in sharing, it also prepares them for the reality of turn-taking in their everyday lives.
You can find the article at http://moms.popsugar.com/Should-You-Teach-Kids-Share-27333250.